Today the weather was just about perfect, which is unusual for northern Illinois this year considering it snowed on Monday and rained Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and was colder than normal, 40 degrees in mid-May. But today it was 75 degrees and a lite breeze with total sunshine and a few wispy clouds. After going to Garfield Farm for a lame "rare" animal expo with my riding friend, Debbie, I came home and walked the dogs and mowed some grass. Nothing out of the ordinary. I fell asleep before dinner because I didn't sleep well last night and then after dinner went out to the barn.
I can't explain the inner quiet and peacefulness that I found with Shyanne this evening. She was glad to see me and very relaxed as I groomed her. She let out a big sigh, cocked on hind leg, and just stood there looking happy. There was a twinkle in her eyes and she just seemed to send out good vibrations, to quote the Beach Boys. I really love this animal and I believe she loves me. I just wanted to stay there and have that feeling forever. I just don't have the right words but its like some of John Denver's songs and the mood they put me in and I want to keep that. I know that's impossible. I saddled up Shyanne and we took a short ride around the property lines on the path I mow in among the trees I planted. It is almost magical at times that I feel so connected to this particular horse. And being in a forest that was planted by myself adds to the mystery and magic of the moment. It was so quiet and we could hear birds singing all around us. A few red wing black birds buzzed us to let us know we were too close to their nests. Shyanne is very tall and my head, I'm sure, was near the nests. One of these protective mother birds scared Shyanne and then her mood changed a bit. She was suspicious of the tree tops.
Shyanne loves to eat clover from the hay field when we ride out back and I spoil her by letting her have some. She drops a lot of it because of the bit in her mouth, but it amazes me that she never drops her carrots when I give her one. So she gets a mouth full of lush green clover and we move on. For a big beautiful horse, she can't run worth a crap. She has navicular disease in her front feet and I'm sure partially foundered at one point, but even before that she grew so fast, so fat, and on such tiny feet that she always ran sort of sideways. Its like she misfires. I don't think she ever learned how to run properly, which I think is strange for a horse. In 18 years it has been only a few times that I have seen her run like the other horses. She just doesn't seem to know what to do with her feet. But that's OK. She has a wonderful walk.
Sometimes when I feel like this I get tears in my eyes. I am so blessed to have this peace and I never know for sure when or if it will present itself again, so I guess the tears are out of sadness and longing for more. The majority of times in my life that I have felt this sensation has been when I am with horses. I totally feel that God is at work in me at these time. He is also at work in Shyanne.
I savor these moments, especially this year when it seems that the world is falling apart. The horrible winter and Bill's heart attack have weighed heavily on me. I am thankful I have these moments.
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